What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Why cant I sleep? When I'm about to fall asleep, I get excited that im about to sleep, causing me to wake up again. It repeats till my sleepiness is gone. I tried taking melatonin and not using my phone, but I end upawake for hours.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why do some guys treat girls so badly?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

How can parents identify and address early signs of racial bias in young children?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

When British people write X after everything, are they being serious or trying not to be awkward?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What are your thoughts on RM's new album "Right Place, Wrong Person"?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What qualities do single women typically look for in a man? Is it a common preference for women to want a man who earns more than they do?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

TEXT:

What was the weakest period in US history in terms of military strength? Was it during World War II or the Vietnam War?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

What is the best way to keep my vagina clean and fresh?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Is Melania still angry that she failed as a model? Why is she so cold and hostile? Why did she blame everyone for her actions in her trite book?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What movies have not aged well?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?